Ep. 150 From Barely Walking To Running Ultramarathons with Rita Marie Honeycutt

[00:00:06] I'm Michele Simms and this is The Beauty in the Mess, a community where people who crave a shift in mindset, personal growth, and connection to like-minded people come together to start rewriting their stories. Through engaging, honest, and insightful conversations, the show will help you embrace the mess to recognize the meanings and the lessons it holds and discover its hidden treasures to help you start making a mindset shift. Let's listen, learn, and reclaim who we were meant to be.

[00:00:33] Hi friend, welcome to The Beauty in the Mess. Today's conversation is such a powerful reminder that healing and strength don't always happen the way we expect them to. My guest today is Rita Honeycutt, author, athlete, and ultramarathon runner, but what makes her story incredible isn't just the races she's completed, it's where she started.

[00:00:54] After dealing with serious heart issues, a pacemaker, and a devastating back injury that left her barely able to walk at just 35 years old, Rita found herself facing depression, chronic pain, and the overwhelming fear that her life might never look the same again. But instead of giving up, she took one small step, and then another, and then another. And what started as simply trying to walk for 15 minutes became a journey of rebuilding not only her body, but her mindset, her confidence, and her entire life.

[00:01:24] In this episode, we talk about resilience, chronic illness, mental strength, and body image motivation, and why movement became medicine for Rita in more ways than one. And honestly, whether you're struggling physically, emotionally, or mentally, there's something in this conversation for you. Hi, I'm Michele Simms, your host. I'm just a regular person who, like so many others, has faced my fair share of messes. Life hasn't always been neat or easy, but it's taught me a lot, and somewhere along the way, I got deeply curious.

[00:01:54] How do other people make it through their messes and not just survive, but thrive? That started my pursuit. I started searching for stories, wisdom, and real strategies, not only for myself, but for anyone looking for a better way forward. Maybe there's a faster way, a softer way, a more human way, and maybe we don't have to figure it out alone. That question started my pursuit. I believe we grow through shared stories, lived wisdom, and the beautiful mess of being human.

[00:02:21] So welcome to the conversation. I'm so glad you're here. Please join me for episode 150 of The Beauty and the Mess, called From Barely Walking to Ultra Marathons with Rita Honeycutt. So without further ado, let's get into it. Hi, Rita. Welcome to The Beauty and the Mess. I'm so glad to have you with me today. Thank you. I'm so glad to be here. Thank you. Now, I know you're an author and actually an ultra marathon runner, but before we kind of dig deeper into all of that,

[00:02:51] I was wondering if you'd tell us some of your backstory, what has led you to this place in your life? Yes, ma'am. So it all started, honestly, when I was much, much younger. I joined the Air Force when I was 18, and while I was in, I had developed some heart problems, and those have kind of been a challenge over the years for me. And then in 2021, one of the wires to my pacemaker broke, and I was laid up for a few months.

[00:03:18] And being laid up from that surgery also injured my back from laying around too much, even though that's what I was told to do. From there, it was trying to navigate having to deal with these new issues with the back injury and not being as mobile as I wanted to be, especially at 35 years old. And from there, I was set down a path by some really good people that started getting me more mobile, getting me more active,

[00:03:45] and just trying to overcome all those different things. It led me to writing my book because I felt like throughout that journey, sometimes I felt like I was very alone. And I knew that I wasn't, but I didn't know who to connect with. And so when I wrote the book, I wrote it like I was talking to a friend because I wanted people to know you're not alone. The struggles happen, but there's ways to overcome them.

[00:04:10] And so through that journey, it's just, it's kind of blossomed into so much more. I work with somebody now at an ADA athletic gym, trying to get other people that have had back injuries, these amputees, wheelchairs, walkers, canes, whatever the case may be, into a gym setting that's safe for them. Because to me, anybody should be able to work out. And it's crazy because like this past week, I've been watching the Arnold over the weekend

[00:04:36] and seeing these bodybuilders on the national level in a wheelchair and still not letting anything stop them. There's a whole community out there. It's just so well hidden. And now that I've tapped into it, it's everywhere in my life. And so the whole point of, I feel like the injury set me on a path to find other people that needed to work through these things. And it has been eye-opening working through all of it.

[00:05:04] I'm sure your mindset totally changed when you had the heart issues and then compiled with the back issues. So how do you even overcome mentally before you can even start the physical part of the journey? It was definitely a challenge. Those first few months after the back injury really like, God, it brought me down. I won't even lie. I was so depressed because I couldn't do anything.

[00:05:28] And then my anxiety was so compounded because I was like, I can't even bend over and tie my shoes without being in pain. And so navigating all of that was really hard. And thankfully, I've had a really great support group between my husband and then my best friend of 25 years. The two of them were like, you can do this. You can do this. And they just kept pouring positivity into my life. And then I finally got hooked up with a really great therapist. And she walked me through so many different things.

[00:05:55] And I'm still working with her because to me, even though I come from a mental health background, I was like, all good therapists have good therapists. And she's really worked with me to navigate some of the boundaries and the things that I thought I had. And it was just a matter of mind over matter at that point. And she has been phenomenal walking me through, okay, this is this, try this or work on this. And it has been huge.

[00:06:19] But it was very difficult in the beginning to really wrap my head around being only 35 years old and barely able to walk. There were days I would get up and the sciatic pain would be so bad in my legs that I was like, I couldn't even get dressed for work. And I had to rely on my husband and my daughter just to get me up and mobile every morning. So what were your first small steps? Do you remember? Was it just trying to walk a certain distance? Yes.

[00:06:46] So when I started, I thankfully met a really good doctor. And he was probably the first doctor that I had that as a woman, it's always, oh, it's hormone related. And it's, no, no, I'm in pain. It's not hormones. And he was like, no, something is wrong. And I was so thankful that he listened because he was like, we need to just get you walking any kind of distance. Because at that point, it was like from the house to the car to my desk and then back home and right back into the same things.

[00:07:14] And so he just got me started with, let's just get you a mile. Let's just get you 15 minutes, whatever it needed to be. And so those little baby steps really helped. And so in 2022, after I had been working with him for about six months, I walked my first 5K. It took me an hour and a half to do, but I did it. And then from there, once that pain started to subside, it was just like, just, I haven't stopped since then.

[00:07:41] But it was just 15 minutes on the treadmill was all I could do when I started. And that was okay because at least I was doing something. So what do you think the hardest habit or belief was to break for you when you're in that mindset and coming over? It was getting into the gym, honestly. Forcing myself to get myself up and just go. Because that was the thing too, is I had equipment here at the house. But as we all know, that equipment sits in the corner and it collects dust. And laundry.

[00:08:10] And so, yep. And so it was just, okay, just go to the gym. Even if it's just for a few minutes, go and do something. And so I started with on my watch, if I could just get 15 minutes of activity a day, building that habit was step one for me. Because once I started going to the gym, like on the days I don't go to the gym, my coworkers would be like, you didn't work out this morning, did you? And I'm like, how can you tell? And they're like, you're so cranky. Oh, wow.

[00:08:38] Because for me, it was like, it was a chance to, it's a chance to just leave all my stress behind me. Working out is so good for building endorphins and making you feel better. And like I said, it doesn't matter what you do. It doesn't matter if you're swimming or biking or lifting weights, as long as you're being mobile. And so for me, it was developing that positive habit of I need to get up and I need to go to the gym. And that has been such an important part of this journey for me.

[00:09:06] So when you were first starting out, did you tell yourself you had to do this every day? I have to go. Oh, yeah. I have to go. I need to go. I must go. There were so many days where I wanted to talk myself out of going to the gym. And it was starting to become easier to talk myself into going to the gym because it was like, well, if you go at this time, then you can get this, this and this done before you go to work. And that kind of, it just spiraled into this positive lifestyle because then it was like,

[00:09:35] oh, well, if I get up early, I can prep dinner for tonight. So when I walk in the door, everything's ready. It became easier to just go because then it was like, well, your whole day will be so much better if you just start the day on the right foot. And there were days that I was like, I'm not going to make it today, but maybe I can make it after work. And then it got to the point where I was like, man, I'm going to go work out twice a day because I just felt, I felt so much better working out.

[00:10:01] Even this morning with the time change yesterday, it really, it always throws me for a loop. And I got to the gym a little bit late, but I was like, I'm so glad that I forced myself to get up and get moving because I got a really good swim in this morning and I'm prepping for this triathlon. So I'm like, I have to go. So, and it's become so much easier, like I said, to just go in the morning and get it done. That way I've got the whole day to feel better. Yeah. It's a wonderful place to be where you can actually, it's easier to talk yourself into doing it than not doing it.

[00:10:30] A lot of us don't get to that point. That's beautiful. So what do you think the milestones were for you? Like when did you, did you, a lot of us, I guess is what I'm thinking. A lot of us, myself included, you have to feel like you're making some sort of positive change or some sort of positive result, or you get frustrated and unmotivated. So how did you handle those rough days when you might've felt like you weren't making as much progress as you hoped to?

[00:11:01] Yeah. And that was the thing is my, like my first milestone was my first 5k that I had to pay for. Cause now I'm like, well, I paid for it. So I have to go, even if I just finished the 5k, it didn't matter how long it took me as long as I went. And when I did that first 5k, like it, it really just, it kind of, it became almost addictive. So athletes addiction is a real thing. Oh wow.

[00:11:30] And so I, I got that first finisher medal when I crossed the finish line and I was like, well, now I want the next one. And so from there it was just keep hitting these little milestones. So I had been doing 5k for a while and I said, well, let me do my first 10k. And that one was awful because it was in July. So I did it for the 4th of July freedom run, but it was so nice because with that race, they have a tail walker. So no matter what, you couldn't come in last.

[00:12:00] And so out of 200 people, I came in 199th and I'm like, but I wasn't last. I love that. Things like that really start pushing you to do more because you're like, well, I want to do better. And you start competing against yourself. I always say when I go and I do these things, I'm not going to compete. I'm going to complete. And as long as I do it like that, that was all that mattered to me.

[00:12:26] Even this weekend, we had a race and I think I came in three minutes slower than I did last year. And I'm like, I had to really give myself grace. I'm like, well, you did just have surgery three weeks ago on your feet. Wow. But I did it and I only had a three minute difference from last year. So pushing those things has been really helpful. And so now I'm like, I think I've got 30 different medals and some, most of them are finisher medals, but I think I've got two where I actually placed and I'm like, I wasn't even

[00:12:55] going to place. I just wanted to get it done. So those things really start motivating you because you're like, I have this physical reward. It's kind of like when you're a kid and you clean your room and your mom, here's a piece of chocolate. It's no, it's no different. They say it's easier to lose the weight than to maintain the weight loss. So is that what helps you maintain is that reward system? Yes. And that was the thing too, is I really had to come to terms with, it was no longer about losing weight.

[00:13:22] It was about being healthy because at first I lost 50 pounds off the bat. Wow. Then I started gaining some weight back, but my pant size didn't change, but it was because I was densing up. I started lifting heavier. I started working on my strength. And like when people look at me now, they can never believe that I'm in my one eighties and I'm like, yes, but I'm also lifting over 250 pounds. So yes, I heavier, but my pant size has not changed since the initial weight loss.

[00:13:51] So I always tell people the scale is not your friend because it's not looking at the whole picture. For me, it was moving down the pant sizes. And so I still want to get down one more pant size is my long-term goal. And so I've kept that pair of size eighteens because when I get to where I want to be, I'm going to take that picture and be like, look how far I came, like the Weight Watchers picture. That's awesome. But for me, it was like I said, it was no longer about weight loss. It was about feeling good.

[00:14:21] Do I wake up every morning and do I feel okay? Because I have seen people that they've had these huge weight loss journeys and they don't feel any better because now they're like dragging and they're sluggish and they're fatigued because they're practically starving themselves. And I'm like, no, I like food. I'm not giving up food. Just finding out where you're comfortable has been like the biggest thing I've tried to explain to people. Just get comfortable with where you're at and try to ignore the number because it's not

[00:14:50] always the best thing. So can I ask if your heart health improved also? If that's too personal, you don't have to answer. But no. So unfortunately with my heart rate, that will never go away. Okay. Unfortunately. So I have a pacemaker and it keeps my heart regulated, but without my pacemaker, my resting heart rate was 29. Oh wow. Which is really, really low. And so being an athlete, your resting heart rate of course stays low.

[00:15:17] So unfortunately I will have the pacemaker for the rest of my life, but I have not let that stop me. And even this weekend, I met a gentleman out on the trail and he was like, Hey, can I run with you? I heard that, you know, the trail system out here. And I said, yeah, absolutely. And we got to talk and come to find out he's a heart patient as well. So I ran for three miles with this 65 year old man. And we just, it was nice to have somebody there to motivate each other. Cause he's, I've got this going on. And I'm like, I've got this going on.

[00:15:43] And so we kind of bonded over our defective hearts, but it was so nice because it's like a lot of people think, Oh, I have this health thing. I can't do it. It's you can, you just might have to find a way to modify the way you're doing things. Yeah, for sure. So do you ever stop and think, I can't believe I'm doing all this now that I can't believe this is my life now? Oh yeah. Even this morning, I messaged a friend of mine. He's a professional bodybuilder.

[00:16:12] I say that, but you would never know because he walks with a cane. A lot of the times he was injured while he was in the Marine Corps. And now he's this professional bodybuilder. Wow. And this morning when I messaged him, I was like, look, I think I want to start like taking my lifting to the next level. And I was like, I know I'll never be at competitive rate. And he was like, yeah, you never thought you'd be a runner either, but here you are. And so those are the mornings where I'm like, okay, yeah, I really can do this because these people are cheering for me.

[00:16:41] Because there are so many days where I'm like, Oh, do I need to get up? Do I need to get up while this rooster is still crowing before my alarm clock has even gone off and start my day? But then I have people like that who are motivating me. And I'm like, if this Marine who's literally crippled can be out there competing at the national level, there's no reason why I can't go to the gym. Wow. So can you tell us what, for those of us that aren't runners, what's the difference between an ultra marathon and a marathon?

[00:17:11] So a marathon is 26.2 miles, which is still a long day. For sure. Anything past that is considered an ultra marathoner. Okay. So I did my first ultra marathon this January, and that was 31.2 miles. And when I got done, I was so tired. And all I wanted to do was eat everything in sight because I think I burned like almost 4000 calories that day. Wow. But ultra ultra marathoning is a different beast.

[00:17:39] And so now I'm trying to like, after being laid up for the past few weeks, getting back into running that far again, because I'm like, I want to do another one, which is crazy because I never thought I'd get past a 5k. So now I'm like, let's go do more. And even this weekend, we did this five miler. And it was funny because we were talking to somebody and I'm like, well, it's only five miles. And he's like, I can't believe you just said only five miles. I'm like, after you run 31 miles, like anything less than that is only.

[00:18:08] So does your husband or best friend run with you? So my husband does not run. Okay. He has a t-shirt that he wears at the finish line that has a little running man through it with an X. And it says, I do not run. And my friend Katie, her and I are actually getting ready to do our first mammoth march together in actually just four weeks now. So I did my first mammoth march this past year, which is a 20 mile endurance hike. Oh, wow. And so she's going to go do this with me in April up in Virginia.

[00:18:38] They hold them all over the country. And now I'm like, well, I want to do all 32 of them because I think they're in 32 states. And I'm like, I want to go do all of them. So it's hard because her husband's military. So we don't get to run together very often, but I send her stuff. She sends me stuff. We try and make our schedules work when we can. But it's nice to know I have this accountability partner, even though she's far away. We message each other. And I'm like, did you eat enough protein today? And she said, did you go to the gym yet?

[00:19:06] And so just having that positivity has been so great. And like I said, we've known each other for so long that she has no problem being like, get your butt in gear. She can say whatever she wants to, and she knows I'm going to go do it. So do you think that's your next goal, the 32? Yeah. So my next goal is actually have a triathlon coming up in April. Okay. And that's swimming, biking, and running. Is that right? Yep. So it's a half a mile swim, a 14 mile bike, and a five mile run. Wow.

[00:19:34] And so I said, well, after the ultra, that's 31 miles. That day is just a five miler, but the swimming part is the part I'm nervous about. I'm an okay swimmer. I've gotten so much better over the past few months, but this is definitely going to challenge me in a different way. But my two goals for 2026 was to run an ultra and to complete a triathlon. I already did the ultra. So now I'm like, well, I have to do the triathlon. That's going to be nothing. So did your doctor ever have qualms about all this?

[00:20:04] Or was he like, go read a go? Yeah. So he unfortunately passed away about a year ago. But while I was going through this journey, he was like, if you don't have to stop, don't stop. Wow. And I haven't because for him, he's as long as you're moving, you're strengthening your back. And if you're strengthening your back, that herniated disc is not going to keep moving around. And I noticed as soon as my back started getting stronger, exactly like he said, that disc started to hurt a lot less.

[00:20:32] And the pain in my legs started to get a lot less. And I'm like, man, if I had known the key to this was to just get mobile in the first place. Wow. I would have started there. But so far, my doctors have all been great and trying to find different ways to support me. My cardiologist has changed the settings on my pacemaker. So I'm not struggling as much with stuff like that. We've really had to deal with working through the asthma. I never had asthma before until about two years ago.

[00:21:01] And apparently, when you get exposed to so many lovely things, I was working in a government building that was covered in black mold. Oh, wow. And then, yeah, then I started developing these asthma issues. And so now that the pulmonologist is like, okay, well, we're going to work on breathing activities and we're going to do this. And so far, all of my doctors have been super supportive. And none of them have been pushy about medication, which is so nice. Because usually the doctors are just like, here's a prescription.

[00:21:30] And all of them have been like, no, let's try something else. And it's been very positive experience, thankfully. Awesome. What do you think the biggest lesson you've learned through your own journey is? Just to not give up. That was so crucial. There were so many days where I wanted to give up. There's even days now. It was a day like two weeks ago where I'm like, God, I don't want to anymore. And my husband was like, well, you have no choice because you've signed up for the trail pass for the years.

[00:22:00] You've already signed up for six races. But it was just making sure I just don't give up hope. Because I know that the moment I start letting those little things back into my life is the moment that it's all going to come crashing down around me again. And so I've just tried to surround myself with the people I want to be like. There's this 83-year-old woman that has been at every race I've done over the past year. And this past race, I finally caught up to her.

[00:22:29] And I said, I don't know who you are, but I want to be like you when I grow up. And she was just so motivational because she's, I just, I never stopped. She's, I was afraid if I stopped, I wouldn't be mobile. And I see it now because the people that are my, like retiring and my retirement plan is to travel. But I see them getting ready to retire and they can't travel because they have all these different issues because they didn't take care of their bodies. And I'm like, I need to make sure I'm taking my care of my body now.

[00:22:59] So when I'm literally double the age I am now, I can still go do those things. So just not giving up no matter how hard or bad the day seems. And there are days where I work out and I'm like, well, that workout kind of sucked, but at least I made it to the gym. Even if I just did yoga, I did something. So what would you say to somebody who feels like they are alone? A lot of times it's so much easier to, like you said, just having someone you can talk to about it, even if they're far away.

[00:23:28] But a lot of people don't have that. So what should they do? So I did not have this community until I start going to the gym. As soon as I went to the gym, I started building this community. And the first person that really did it in for, I don't even know this lady's name. I just know I was working out. And then I was out of the gym for three days because I had a head cold or something. And when I got back into the gym, this complete stranger walked up to me and was like, Hey, we've missed you the past few days. You good? You've been doing amazing.

[00:23:59] And I'm like, thank you. That's sweet. Yeah. Because when you go to the gym at five o'clock in the morning, it's a very select group of people. I'm sure. And even though you don't know all of each other, you start to learn each other's faces. And so it was nice knowing that these perfect strangers were rooting for me. And from there, I've just developed this whole community around me of people. So at first, yes, I felt very alone.

[00:24:26] But when you start being part of this community, you won't be along for very long. And I love with running, like when you're out on a run, people will go run past you. They'll be like, you're doing a great job and give you a thumbs up as they go blasting by you. But they're so humble and motivational because they want you to succeed. That's awesome. The faster people need us slow people, because if not, how are they going to be faster than? Yeah, I know I wouldn't worry about speed.

[00:24:56] I would just worry about completing it for myself. Yeah. Yeah. But I know you talked about working with a local gym on an ADA program. Could you explain, first of all, what ADA means for people who may not know? Yes. So ADA is the American Disability Act. And so I've been working with Katie Rose over at Thrive Fitness. We developed a program that's basically like a CrossFit program for people with mobility issues.

[00:25:24] It'll only be the second one in the state of North Carolina. Wow. Because people don't realize how important it is or how neat it is. Because when you're going through the process, you go from physical therapy to nothing. There's no in between. And I was going to physical therapy and I was doing well. And then they released me. And so then I went over and I joined Planet Fitness. I just moved over to the Y because I needed the pool. But there was nothing that was like a bridge between those two.

[00:25:52] And I didn't know what to do, what kind of equipment I should be using. And so this gym allows that gap to kind of be bridged. Working with people that might have amputees, walkers, wheelchairs, whatever it may be, this gym gives them the ability to start moving to that next level. And I love it because like when we go and compete at different things, like we do like the DECAs, there'll be people out there in wheelchairs and they are crushing it. Wow.

[00:26:19] And I feel like by bringing more attention to the issue at hand, it also lets those people know you don't have to work out alone because we have the Paralympics and everything, but not everybody wants to be in. Sometimes they just want to go to the gym. And so that was why this program was so crucial. Oh yeah, I can see that. I know you mentioned CrossFit and I just have to say, there's something about the words CrossFit that are so intimidating to a lot of people. I know it is to me, I hear it and I'm like, oh, I can't do that.

[00:26:48] I mean, so what would you say to people that are having that reaction, especially if they have mobility issues or. Yeah. So CrossFit is not what people think it is because the first time I heard it, I also was like, yeah, there's no way. And then the first time I did CrossFit, I'm like, no, this really is not as bad as I thought it was going to be because CrossFit is exactly that. It's cross training and fitness. Okay.

[00:27:15] But it sounds so intimidating, but it's a combination of cardio and strength training and mobility. There's so many different components to it. And so a lot of times when you see people in CrossFit, you're seeing the tip of the iceberg, right? You're not seeing what it took to get there. And for me, when I say that I do CrossFit, I don't have the typical CrossFit body when

[00:27:40] you picture somebody in that realm, but I can do it just as well, sometimes better because I've practiced so much more. And for me, like, it wasn't just about looking muscular. I wanted to have the strength to do these things. And the thing is like the rowing machine is probably one of the best things. And that's a huge part of CrossFit training is you are literally like simulating what it would be like if you were in a boat rowing and it's a full body workout.

[00:28:09] And it's so good for you because it's strengthening your core, strengthening your back. It's all of these different components, but it's not as it's not what people think it is. I don't think, because like I said, I was also intimidated. The first time I went to a CrossFit gym, I'm like, I'm going to die. That's what you think. But I went in and I did it. And honestly, the only thing I could not do was the jumping of the rope. I just don't have the mental capacity to jump rope.

[00:28:38] If somebody else was swinging the rope for me, I got it. But other than that. So what kind of barriers are you guys working through for the mobily challenged people? Having a ramp was the first thing because like one of the things that blew my mind is we were going through the process and trying to get permits. And I actually had somebody from inspections that was like, why do you need a ramp at a gym? And I'm like, the question is the reason why we need a ramp at a gym?

[00:29:07] Because half the time, these gyms aren't even accessible for somebody to get into. And then getting certain specialized equipment for them to use because, and the thing is, it's not as far-fetched as you would think. Some of the equipment that we were using is stuff that you see like these gymnasts using at the Olympics, like when they're doing like the bar hangs and stuff. I'm like, that is stuff that they need to do this process.

[00:29:34] Like I said, having just accessibility into the gym one and then a safe space. And sometimes it's a matter of equipment just needs to be spaced out more so that somebody can put their wheelchair there or they have their walker next to them. And so many times you go into the gym and all the treadmills are just lined up. Right. You're going to need to put things further apart because the thing is, somebody might be able to walk a distance on a treadmill, but when they get off the treadmill, they need their walker there.

[00:30:00] And having the accessibility to get off the treadmill and grab their walker is huge. And so that was one of the big things is spacing everything out and then making levels. So the things like when I started with Katie and the first time I worked out with her, it was so awful. I went outside after my workout and I threw up and I was like, oh my God, I need my husband to come get me. It was so bad. And so he picked me up and he's, well, you're going back. Right. And I was like, of course I'm going back.

[00:30:28] But one of the things was she was like very much about, okay, this is level one. This is level two and level three. If you have to start at and stay at level one, that's perfectly acceptable. And there are some people who never get to level three because they don't have the ability to, but that doesn't mean that they shouldn't be able to do the same workout. And so that's been a huge part of this gym is giving everybody a space to do the things that they need to the way that they need to. That's beautiful. Really?

[00:30:56] So what has surprised you the most as far as I'm sure you're starting to, or well into seeing how you've impacted other people. So what has surprised you the most from that? It was honestly the fact that I impacted other people. I had a phone call on Friday with one of our community partners because my full-time job, I'm in the veteran world. And she said, I just want to tell you something real quick that doesn't have to do with work. And I was like, yeah, what's up?

[00:31:25] And she goes, I'm just so proud of you and how far you've come. And I can't wait to get where you're at now. And I'm like, it's crazy. Cause in my mind, I'm like, I want to be like this 83 year old, you know, ultra marathoner. And this person, I just want to be like you. And I'm like, I, I never thought I would have that. And for me, it's almost motivating to go to the next level because I'm like, somebody wants to be like me.

[00:31:51] And getting that positive reinforcement has been so crucial because at first it's hard when you look in the mirror, right? You don't see the changes in your body. It takes a while, but when you start seeing the changes, it's the first, it's the first time you've got that reinforcement that you're doing the right thing. But when people around you start saying, man, I want to do what you're doing, or I'm proud of you. It's been a huge impact knowing that I've impacted other people. That's awesome. Yeah.

[00:32:20] I know even being on a diet or changing your lifestyle or whatever you want to call it. But a lot of times we can't wait to see the results. And like I said, it's very frustrating when your body's not reacting the way you thought it would or hoped it would. But recently my husband and I decided to change our lifestyle, how we were eating and things. And this time I have a different attitude. I do get on the scale all the time, but I don't let it deter me.

[00:32:47] If I know that I had a good day and I did what I was supposed to do, then I'm just like, oh, well, it'll come. And that's new for me because before I'd be like all flustered and upset and thinking I did something wrong. But if I know I did everything the way I'm supposed to, or think I'm supposed to, I just try to let it roll off my back. Yeah. It's hard because logically as humans, we know that muscle weighs more than fat.

[00:33:15] However, you look at that scale and you're like, why won't it go down? But it's, well, how much more muscle did you gain? And so for me, the two big things that I use was progression pictures were huge because then I could physically see the difference. And then once I, like I said, I saved that first pair of pants and every time I go down a pair of pant size, I'm like, okay, we're getting there because the pant size keeps changing. Do you ever think about those scales?

[00:33:44] Like it's kind of like a deck scanner, but it's a scale that you have at home that supposedly measures muscle mass. And yes. Do you have one of those or? Yes. Yeah. That was one of the things that my husband bought me when I started all of this is he bought me the fit index one where I can see what my water weight is, my skeletal mass, my muscle mass. Cause that was the other thing too, is you think you're drinking enough water, but it's are you? And so with the scale, I like that.

[00:34:12] It's not just looking at the number it's looking at the whole body. And so for me, when I was going through that transition of gaining the weight back because I was densing up so much, it was nice to see that. Yes. The fat index was coming down and the muscle index was coming up. So yes, I highly, highly recommend them. You can get them on Amazon. 100% well worth it. Yeah. I would think that would help tremendously because you can see your body actually putting the muscle on.

[00:34:40] So what does strength have a whole new meaning for you now than like when you started your journey? Yes. Because that was the thing is to me, I would see people doing the strength training and I was like, I want to be able to lift this weight. And that was one thing I had to say. I was, I've always been pretty strong growing up on a farm. You kind of have to be because you're moving hay and you're dealing with horses and you're dealing with cattle. You have to be physically strong.

[00:35:05] And I still am, but I feel like my mental strength is a different level than it ever was before. Because like before I would let things just crush my soul that had no business to. And now it's no, I'm strong because I can overcome these things mentally as physically. And it's really been a shift in, in the way I've had to think. And it's, it did not come overnight. And I let people know you're, when you're dealing with trying to get your physical and

[00:35:33] your mental health back on track, it is not going to happen overnight. So that was one thing that I really had to work through was like, no, you can do this. No, you can do this. Every day I had to keep telling myself, you can do this. And now, like I said, I'm to the point where I'm like, oh yeah, that's no problem. I can do that. No, no worries. Have you thought about becoming a coach or a trainer for other people? Yes and no. So I've hemmed and hawed one of, one of the things that has, well, I would say the only

[00:36:03] thing that has held me back is my full-time job. I love what I do. So my full-time job, I work with disabled veterans, helping them navigate the VA, get them their benefits, their compensation, go through that process. And if I were to become a full-time trainer, I would have to give that up. And I don't think I could. I've taken off a couple of weeks because I'm in the middle of starting a position within the veteran world. And I haven't stopped because when I took off the few weeks, I'm like, oh, this will be

[00:36:32] great time to like train for my triathlon. And instead I've been in meetings like literally every single day trying to figure out, can we build more housing? What do we need to do to get these grants to these nonprofits for mental health for state? So the only thing I would say really stopping me from doing my own thing is that I just, I love what I do full-time, but maybe when I retire, that will be my new job. It sounds like you're totally geared for it. That's why I asked.

[00:37:02] So I want to give you some time to talk about your book. So fill us in on that. I know you've written a book about your journey. Yeah. So the book goes through the raw and the real, because to me, one of the things, like I said, we see the tip of the iceberg. We see these people at these national competitions and we're like, oh, that looks amazing. And so I wanted to talk about all the things that led to this point, because I feel like people often get lost in getting to that end result.

[00:37:31] Like you said, there's the days where you're like, the scale's not moving. What am I doing wrong? You get discouraged. And so in the book, I talk about all those things where I was discouraged. I was struggling. I dealt with the runner's blues. I dealt with all these different things, having to try and overcome different injuries, trying to understand what food looked like. Because I used to punish myself so much about, oh, I'm eating too much or I shouldn't eat that. Well, food is fuel.

[00:37:58] But you have to rethink about how food looks when you're fueling for different things. When I'm fueling to do an endurance thing versus a strength thing, it looks very different. And even now, trying to work through some of the different things, trying to just get used to different breathing techniques. But I laid all that out in the book, because I know so many people, when they're trying to start this journey, are struggling with those things. And so there were so many different components within the book that it was like dealing with

[00:38:27] hormone health as a female is super important. Dealing with trying to figure out your schedule, because some people don't have natural time. And dealing with time management was something that I was very fortunate. I was natural at when I went into the military. I was already prepared. But some people struggle with a schedule. And so I laid out, this is the schedule that I have used. Use it as a template. So the book goes over all of the things that the average person struggles with.

[00:38:57] And so next week, actually, my cookbook will also come out. Because one of the things I hear people say is, I don't know what to eat. Or I don't have time to cook these extravagant meals. And I'm like, I don't either. I just use a crock pot for everything. I was just going to say, nutrition has to be a huge part, right? Yes. And that's the thing too, is I have learned, especially over the past year, it's really focused on that eating healthier is easier and cheaper than eating out.

[00:39:26] So it used to be, I would be like, oh, I'm just going to grab McDonald's because it's cheap and it'll feed the whole family. Well, it is no longer cheap and it will not feed the whole family. It is actually cheaper for me to go make everybody salads. Right. So the nutrition part too has been huge. Because the thing is, it's like, if you eat junk, you're going to feel like junk. And so all of those things are laid out in the book. And like I said, the cookbook is coming out to really hone those things in and talk about how important protein is versus carbs.

[00:39:56] But at the same time, you need carbs if you're doing endurance. There's so many different components to it. So how did you learn all of the nutrition part of it? Was it just trial and error or research? Yep. I sat down with a nutritionist. Oh, wow. She turned me on to a really good book. It's called Foods That Harm and Foods That Heal. And so I worked through understanding what foods were. I had somebody come up to me the other day and they're like, man, I've been eating carrots like crazy. And I'm like, that sounds really good.

[00:40:25] However, I was like, carrots are just sugar. And he was like, oh, I didn't realize that. And I'm like, it's good to have a couple of carrots. But if you're sitting down and eating bags of them every day, it's not as healthy for you as you would think. I'm like, go ahead and eat jerky, those high protein foods. Because if you're trying to build muscle, you need protein. And so it was a lot of trial and error research, talking to nutritionists. My nutrition has been absolutely amazing. She was the one who was like, I'm going to tell you something you don't want to hear.

[00:40:54] She said, bananas, they got to go. And I was like, oh, but I love bananas. And so when we were trying to get my blood sugar back under control, it was really rough giving up the one thing that I'm like, this is my sweet treat every day. And she was like, they can come back once we get your blood work where it needs to be. So it has been a process and a learning curve. Oh, wow. Yeah, sure.

[00:41:18] I would think that was, well, there's so many aspects to it, but learning how to lift properly, but also the whole nutrition aspect. And I think that's why some people get intimidated just because it seems like there's a lot, right? Yeah. Oh, yeah. It was definitely one of those things too. I used to think, oh, salads are super good for you. And it's not that they're bad for you, but for what I was trying to do, she's, you don't want salad. And she, I was like, I thought that I was supposed to eat this.

[00:41:46] She's no, eat everything you put on the salad. She's, if you're putting chicken or bacon or cucumbers, all of those things, eat that because for the lettuce, it's filling you up, but there's no nutrition to it. And I'm like, yeah, I would have never thought of it like that. Well, we've always been taught that's a good thing, right? Yeah. To fill yourself up with water, essentially. Yeah. It was a good thing. It is in some cases, but not enough. It depends on what you're doing and what you're trying to build.

[00:42:13] And for me trying to slim down and then build that muscle, I just needed to eat like most of my diet is protein. I get at least 150 grams of protein a day. Wow. Is that hard to do? It wasn't at first, but now it's like second nature. It's real easy. I cook chicken breasts one day and I'll, that'll be my snacks throughout the week. And then I'll eat a high protein yogurt and high protein shakes.

[00:42:41] And now if I don't get protein, I am dragging so bad. Oh, wow. So your body's acclimated. Oh yeah. Yeah. Cause that was the thing too, is even at first, my gut, like my gut health changed so much because when you're not eating these heavy foods, your stomach is not bloated and distended. And it was just crazy that I'm like, man, my stomach doesn't hurt because I'm eating these high protein foods that are like flowing through my body. Like they're supposed to.

[00:43:10] Do you, cause I feel like eating, eating better, eating more protein, less carbs, all that. I feel like eating better allows the body to kind of heal itself. Oh yeah. That was a crucial part of the journey was understanding because protein is building the muscle. It's helping with your blood. When you're putting in those healthier options, it definitely heals the body naturally, especially being autoimmune.

[00:43:35] I did not realize like how many different foods out there were just my body that I thought were okay foods, but there's so many foods that cause an inflammation response. And once you get rid of those foods and you don't eat them, and then maybe you grab one once in a while, you're like, oh yeah, I never want to do that. I had a similar situation because I have a couple autoimmune diseases and I actually had

[00:43:59] a functional medicine doctor on the show and I was vegan vegetarian for 15 years. And he said, do you realize that you are making yourself worse just by your diet? And I'm like, what? I thought I was doing the right thing. And he totally, I would say he changed my life because I started researching after that and it was crazy. Yeah. Right. And it's one of those things because I had even when, before I met Michelle and she kind

[00:44:26] of talked to me through food, I had even thought about going vegetarian because I'm like, oh, well, if I'm not eating all of these different things. And she was like, no, no, no, you won't get enough of protein in your body and you would actually harm your body more. And then she said, and then depending on the vegetable, it causes an inflammation response. So I really switched. I always wanted to eat regular potatoes and she's no sweet potatoes are your life now. And I'm like, okay, well, I like sweet potatoes. So no problem. I used to hate sweet potatoes. Now I love them. Oh yeah.

[00:44:57] Once you learn all the different ways to cook them, because I use them, I make potato chips. I make French fries. I do a savory sweet potato. I do a little bit of everything with them. I'm going to have to buy your cookbook. See what all you're doing with the sweet potatoes. Yeah. I cook them a couple of different ways, but I haven't made chips out of them yet. So. Oh yeah. That was one thing when my husband and I got married and one of our friends got us a dehydrator as a wedding present. I'm like, this is the best thing you could have ever bought me. Wow.

[00:45:26] Especially too. I love fruit and I love sweets. So when I was making strawberry and banana chips, I was still getting that candy almost, but it's a strawberry so much better for you than a piece of chocolate. Right? Right. So, and then the nice thing is depending on what it is, you can crunch it up and put it in cereal or put it in your yogurt. It's been a hundred percent worth it. Wow. I'll have to keep that in mind. Something else to try.

[00:45:53] So if somebody is listening and they're like, wow, I love what Rita has to say. I want to, or they want to reach out to you and talk to you more about your story, or they want to find your book. What are the best ways that they can reach out to you or find you? Yep. So they can find me through my website. It's called fluff to tough. And then you can also follow me on Facebook and Instagram. I'm on both of those. Cause I'm always trying to post these positive things. Cause that was one thing is social media can be so negative.

[00:46:20] And I was like, I'm going to post positive stuff no matter what it is. There was one day it was just a post of my gym equipment in front of me. And I'm like, I'm here today. So any of those avenues, like some, my website or Facebook or Instagram has been the best way to get in touch with me. Well, thank you. I've loved hearing about your journey and it is an amazing journey and you inspire so many people just by what you've done yourself, let alone you keep doing it. Yeah.

[00:46:49] That's amazing. Yeah. I keep saying when I put out the book, the front cover is a picture of, I say old me and new me. And I'm so proud of old me for being willing to take that first step. Like she's the one who got me here. And that's what we need to remember is like, wherever you are, once you take that first step, be proud of that person because they're the one that decided to take that step. Very true. And I think we often forget that. Well, thank you for coming on today and sharing your wisdom with us. And I've loved having you. I appreciate it.

[00:47:20] Thank you. I had a great time. Bye-bye. As we wrap up today, I just want to say that that was such an inspiring conversation with Rita. What really stayed with me after this conversation is a reminder that transformation usually doesn't begin with some huge dramatic moment. Most of the time it starts with one small decision, one small step, one small choice to keep going even when it feels hard. Rita went from barely being able to walk to running ultra marathons.

[00:47:48] But what makes her story so powerful is that she didn't wait until she felt confident or fully healed to begin. She just kept showing up for herself over and over again. And I think that that's something all of us can take with us. You don't have to do everything perfectly. You don't have to have it all figured out. You just have to be willing to take the next step. If this episode encouraged you, inspired you, or made you feel a little less alone, make sure you share it with someone else who might need to hear it.

[00:48:16] And if you haven't already, follow the Beauty and the Mess so you don't have to miss upcoming conversations. Rita, thank you for sharing your journey, your honesty, and your heart with us today. And to all of you listening, keep going. Even the smallest step forward still counts. As always, I hope this episode helps at least one person. And with that, I hope you have a blessed week, my friend. Thank you for listening to the Beauty and the Mess.

[00:48:44] If you enjoyed what you heard, please share it with a friend. And if you haven't already, please subscribe, rate, and review this podcast on your favorite pod player. If you have any questions or comments, any topic ideas you would like to hear about, or you think you would be a great guest on the show, you can reach me directly at thebeautyandthemess.com. Thanks for listening. Thank you.